Iam The Indian Summer In Her Coldest Winter

as crzy as shit has been lately i realized i cant even complain...ive had some good things and some bad things..but in reality my good has out weighed my bad.....my fam is full circle .....my bestfriend is reaching higher and higher with his music...and im starting to get school together..and last but def not least ive built a very firm friendship and growing relationship with someone i can now truely call an actual {better half}....i mean ive had many relationship where i thought i could call a chick the "one" and then ive def had some that were a wste of time or just shulda never been a relationship....i feel one of my many flaws in a relationship is being so impulsive and being so rdy to jump into it and another flaw wuld b "backtracking" meaning when ive had a relationship with a chick and after they done so many things to show that i dont need to b with or they just do a nigga wrong i let my feelings get the best of me and i go back with them thinkin shit will b different....ive done that three times with three different girls....and at this point ive grown tired of it ....so the way i do shit now is once im done with a girl especially if she was da reason we broke up...i dont look back frm this day foward i loook toward my future...you cant have a good future if ur always dwelling on ur past especially if its negative things or ppl....i have confidence that this will work becuz before actually dating this "somebody" we took the time to learn how to be friends which is something else ive never really done which is learn how to be a friend first before u try and become a lover......we have communication.......we got fifty million things in common lol.......understanding.....respect for one another......we accept both flaws and good traits and last but not least weve established "TRUST"......i think one huge memory i have btween us is one night we were on one of our late nite convos and it was about 12:12 am and she said somethin like "im nothin like ur past but im all about ur future" now to others that may not seem like somethin major but words like that kind of provokes thought like damn dis chick might really b somethin like a sense of security or confidence........and i mean if this relationship doesnt work out atleats weve instilled a firm friendship to fall back on and i will just continue on with life.....but for now at this point we {Bonnie &Clyde} lookin towards what the future has in store.2009 is my year and so far its a great year !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dedicated to {MotherNature}

2nd semester

well so far 2nd semester is iight.....i mean my classes arent the most liked but i mean its mostly my fault for fuckin around in my earlier years of highschool....my symphonic 4 band class is full of fuckin new tech students and its a little boring....my latin 2 class is iight but my teachers drone way of teaching is torture and full of lectures.....my advance functions class is cool because my teacher is such a push over lol..but its just too many students which makes it hard to find a seat especially if ur late....and my small bizz class wuld b cool if our teacher mr artis wasnt leaving so now im just gonna drop that class and prolly pick up english 4 again....{bitchass schutte flunked me} ovr three fuckin points!!!!!!!!!!!....but anyways as i get closer to grduation i realize that alot of ppl i came into highschool with are no longer present whether due to dropping out or if they passed away...which is most cases in highschools these days.....its crazy cuz its like you go on a rollercoaster of many different friends thru highschool...like ppl you been tight with since middle skool either change or choose a different path dats not a smart path so ovr time u kinda part ways away frm them....but its all apart of life and i believe when one friendship ends ..another one will eventually fall together....or like the saying goes "sometimes things fall apart so some things can fall in place" which brings me to my nxt subject of the very interesting week of had...its amazing how ppl never realize what they have until its gone....like when they see you movin on ..they either talk shit.....get jealous...or try to cause complete madness in ur life cuz they hate that they are no longer in the picture....wats the point of being so FUCKING territorial or protective of something that you lost due to you not appreciating it and lying....why couldnt you hold wat u had close at the time then..but now that youve been erased or put to the back seat ..you seee someone getting in that passenger seat with the kidd so now u wanna work and force urself back to the front ..nah sorry it doesnt work like that ....a person has had not once but twice the chnces to win the kidd heart and blew both chances....only silly hoes sit around and gossip about what goes on in a nigga life without having a clue of wat is really going on.....after reviewing my thoughts of the entire situation ..i laugh cuz its amazing how "some" females can be so conniving to point where its sick...........

What Do You Define As Swag?

its amazing ovr time how everybody now claims how they got swag or who has swag and who doesnt have swag...its definately crazy when a person claims they have swag when really they dont even know what swag is....when you think of the word swag what comes to mind ..wellll hmmmm lets think as if you have the mind of a so called "trapstar" or "baller" lol they wuld say" shit i got swag cuz i got hoes on deck or "i got stacks on deck" soulja boy" {MATTTTTTTTTTT} lol or let my pants hang low....to me if a person thinks this way ....then you are the most ignorant peron known to man....personally i feel soulja boys song turn my swag on was a waste of studio time...beat was kinda hard but the purpose and meaning of the song was idiotic......my personal true definition of swag would the way a person carries them self not measured of how much money or hoes they got or how much pussy they get but really just like what things make you stand out..if you me a person who is more an individual has more swag than anybody because they set standards or even at times they are the trend setters..ppl waste more time tryna be like other ppl when really they never even tried being themselves..therefore cauing them to not know who they are as a person which i wuld like to call "identity crisis" lol.....swag is just a slang word created by todays rappers....the real word would be demeanor which sounds more articulate......and actually makes more sense to say instead of "swag".......

Intro

well first i wuld like to introduce myself....my name is carmen jones.....i plan to leak no further information but that....but ive known about this blog shit for a lil minute i been tempted to make one but never really found time to make one....until my nigga ktr made his soon i realized this shit culd actually b cool.....like to voice out my opinion about shit by anyway i may choose...my blogs will probably send out shots at times depending the situation or how i may b feelin at the time....but anyways this is my blog feel free to comment on any shit that i may place up here....as you can see i have a high love and passion for my music....one of the many things that interest me....i first fell in love with music when i was 6 years old ...and my first hiphop song i ever heard was by the "Fugees Ready or Not"..fire shit .....mainly because the track had great word play and a hard ass beat...but anyways time for this small blog to end.....more soon